Radical Acceptance has its roots in ancient Buddhist philosophy. As it is applied to the treatment of those with Borderline Personality Disorder by Linehan in her DBT skills training it denotes the choice that can be made by those with BPD to be “willing” as opposed to “wilful”. Most people with BPD, at some point or other, find themselves in what are referred to as unregulated moods in which they are not able to effectively manage their emotions. These unregulated moods that manifest so much of borderline toxic relating and borderline behaviour are the result of triggered emotional dysregulation
This is, in fact, an example of wilfulness.

Wilfulness that is a response to abandonment fear and that is a result of the legacy of abandonment in BPD. Abandonment and even more to the point the shame of abandonment borderlines continue to experience is one of the most central realities in and of Borderline Personality Disorder. The central role and importance of this unresolved legacy of abandonment and on-going impact of the core wound of abandonment in BPD are the forces behind the incredible and enduring and self-destructive wilfulness of those with BPD.  Read More …

© A.J. Mahari 2007 with additions November 22, 2008


A.J. Mahari is a Life Coach who, among other
things, specializes in working with those with BPD and non borderlines. A.J. has 5 years experience as a Life Coach and has worked with hundreds of clients from all over the world.


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Borderline Personality Disorder and Radical Acceptance