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It is common for many with Borderline Personality (untreated people with BPD or those in denial) to not only have intense emotions, intense and frequent mood shifts, but also for them to engage others in ways that lower or push past your boundaries. Many, especially with Codependency do not have the known boundaries to realize that a person with Borderline Personality has that very intensity because of their tremendous need to enmesh with a dating interest, family member (on/off again) or “favorite person” to meet their own needs.

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People with Borderline Personality have this intensity due to their unmet needs and inability to meet their own needs internally. The intensity that drives the urge to merge, to quickly become boy/girlfriend or a “friend” is their need to live through others because they do not know who they are. Many with BPD do not have any idea of who they are, where they end, who you are or where you begin. That is a state of totally lacking ego boundaries. The borderline seeks to “become a part of you” as identity for them and in so doing, the more time you spend with a borderline, the more you will lose yourself.

© A.J. Mahari, July 30, 2019 (Video content as well) – All rights reserved.

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Borderlines Intensity and Urge to Merge