As an adult-child of a parent (or in my case parents) with Borderline Personality Disorder the love that is so scarce is toxic and the relationship is enmeshed as the child exists to serve the endless emotional needs of the borderline.
For anyone who is a family member, relationship or ex-relationship partner of someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (often referred to as non borderlines) there is a central painful paradox that is a common experience.
Splitting is a primitive defense mechanism that borderlines routinely enact when they are triggered by events/emotions in the here and now that threaten their feeling anything to do with their original core wound of abandonment and the intrapsychic trauma associated with that abandonment.
A.J. Mahari, a recovered borderline, offers Life Coaching Programs For Those With Borderline Personality Disorder – This first program consists of 6 Sessions Designed To Enhance Awareness