Much is being learned about various biological or neuro-biological implications for those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. Whatever one believes about recent scientific exploration, the jury is still out in terms of proven and agreed upon conclusions. Invalidation in one’s environment, growing up, as a child remains a strong common denominator in the reported experience of most, if not all, who have Borderline Personality Disorder. Invalidation in Borderline Personality Disorder remains a central ingredient in so much of the relational difficulty for those with BPD and their loved ones.
Having feelings, thoughts, and/or perceptions invalidated can leave one feeling abandoned emotionally. It can also leave one feeling the effects of on-going shame as well.
Feelings of abandonment and shame are central to Borderline Personality Disorder. Whether or not others actually invalidated you, abandoned you, or shamed you, or not, it is important that those with BPD learn how to validate what they feel. Perceived abandonment and shame are still very real for the person perceiving them as part of his or her experience.
Invalidation is an isolating experience. It is an experience that exascerbates feeling separate not only from others but the dissociation and separation inside, from one’s authentic self as well. Feeling invalidated is often the result of being triggered.