Many people have heard about aspects or traits of codependence or codependency. What many people do not realize is that more often than not people who lack boundaries and come too close too fast, in any kind of relationship or
What You Focus on is What You will Experience
It might sound obvious to say that what you focus on will be what you experience. The point is, however, that so many people are focused on their experience, mainly, negative experience and/or negative feelings in their lives and confused
The “Adult” Bully – Why?
A.J. Mahari is a Life Coach that helps people cope with and work through the painful consequences of having been bullied. Bullies, in adulthood, try to personify power because they feel helpless and out of control. They tell lies and
It Takes Courage To Be Who You Really Are
We live in a world that values sameness. We live in a world where wars are waged and violent hate and discrimination flourish as the result of the intolerance that exists in the face of difference. It takes courage to
Achieve your goals: Find Out What Is Blocking you?
Many people find that their lives are not fulfilling – that they are unhappy. Many people are not exactly sure why. Often what is at the core of many issues in people’s lives is that they have not actually set
Footsteps of the Past Obstruct The Here and Now
As a Counselor Life Coach, BPD Coach and Mental Health Coach, A.J. Mahari talks with clients every day who are in the on-going experience of having their footsteps from the past obstruct their here-and-now in ways that mean unidentified and
The Co-Dependent’s 12 Steps
A major consequence of unresolved abandonment is codependence. Codependence is very common for many who struggle with issues that they may not recognize stem from unresolved abandonment that see them in unhealthy relationships. Often people with unresolved abandonment issues will
Core of Toxic Relationships – Codependence
Codependence is a mindset that is at the core of toxic relating and toxic, enmeshed, relationships. It is mindset that leads people, often without being aware of it, to try to get their needs met by and/or through others. Neediness
Suffering is a Choice Related to Unresolved Abandonment Issues
Many people experience their emotional suffering as something that is outside of them. Something over which they have no control. The fact is that suffering is really a choice. Say what? Before you get angry or think I’m trying to
Suffering is a Choice Related to Unresolved Abandonment Issues
Many people experience their emotional suffering as something that is outside of them. Something over which they have no control. The fact is that suffering is really a choice. Say what? Before you get angry or think I’m trying to
Unresolved Abandonment and Negative Expectations – Break Free
Life Coach and author, A.J. Mahari, has many coaching clients who are dealing with varying levels of consequences, in their own individual lives and life situations, that are all related to unresolved abandonment issues. Unresolved childhood abandonment issues are often
Feeling All Alone – Borderline Personality Disorder
People diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder often feel all alone. They are often triggered, when relating in various types of relationships and relational dynamics, back to what is their core wound of abandonment. BPD Coach, author, and herself someone who recovered from Borderline Personality Disorder in 1995, A.J. Mahari, talks about how and why people with BPD struggle with feeling all alone – so alone – so often, and what they can do about that. The goal is recovery. You can become aware of the way to find the road to recovery by being fully present in the moment.
Unresolved Abandonment and Negative Expectations – Break Free
Life Coach and author, A.J. Mahari, has many coaching clients who are dealing with varying degrees of consequences, in their own individual lives and life situations, that are all related to unresolved abandonment issues. Does everyone who has unresolved abandonment
BPD Loved Ones Coach A.J. Mahari Interviewed On Healthy Place Mental Health TV Show
In a show that was focused on Loved Ones of people with Borderline Personality disorder and coping with someone with Borderline Personality Disorder in your life, A.J. Mahari, BPD Coach and Life Coach was interviewed to talk about BPD to
Accepting The Pain of Transformation
Transformation is a process of change in nature and/or character, as well as self understanding and reclaiming your authentic self, or more of your authentic self. Transformation is about you defining you and not anyone else and not letting society’s
Mental Illness and The Brain – What’s Wrong with Psychiatry?
Mental Illness and The Brain – What’s Wrong with Psychiatry? Mental illness – is it biological or isn’t? What do you think? I guess I’m a rebel at heart, someone who thinks outside of the box. I know in my own experience, having recovered 15 years from Borderline Personality Disorder, that along the way, on my journey, I had a psychiatrist tell me I wouldn’t get better until they developed some pill – I didn’t believe him. He wasn’t correct. I fired him on the spot after that comment. That was 1987. That was before this notion now forwarded that everything mental illness is a “brain disorder”. Professional in psychiatry are speaking out against the “status quo” of mental illness as a “brain disorder”.
Change Your Thoughts – Change Your Life – End Negative Thought Patterns
Change Your Thoughts – Change Your Life – 19 Coaching Exercises To Help You Change Negative Thought Patterns by Life Coach, A.J. Mahari, is a 102 page Ebook chalk full of information and 19 coaching exercises to help you change negative thinking into positive thinking. This Ebook stresses how much you will benefit from focusing postively on the here-and-now so that the decisions you are making today will help you create a positive, successful and productive future. And this Ebook doesn’t just tell you that, it provides you with practical exercises that will show you how to create positive change and how to not only stop focusing on the negative, stop worrying, but also stop feeling so stressed and stop ruminating on intrusive, negative, and unwanted thoughts. Not everyone can afford Life Coaching. This Ebook gives you exercises to do that I use with many of my clients and now you too can get this help and at a fraction of the price.
Emotional Competence – Part of Overcoming Codependency
Emotional Competence, specifically, to begin with, learning to observe your feelings without reacting to them, is a central beginning in over-coming, among other things, codependency. Author and Life Coach, A.J. Mahari, knows this from her own journey of recovery 15
Abandonment Negativity Impacts Hope in BPD
In her latest Borderline Personality Disorder Inside Out podcast episode, Life and BPD Coach, A.J. Mahari talks about what she calls the core wound of abandonment and the negative impact that creates in the lives of those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). People with BPD need to find hope from the polarized negativity of BPD. Polarized negativity that has its roots in unresolved abandonment. Abandonment negativity impacts hope for those who have BPD and for their loved ones.
Rigid Thought Patterns in Borderline Personality Disorder
Rigid thought patterns in Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) are one of the central manifestations of all that Borderline Personality is and means in the lives of those who have been diagnosed with it. Loved ones and family members are often hurt and confused by these rigid thought patterns also. BPD Coach A.J. Mahari identifies three main reasons why people with BPD have such rigid thought patterns. These rigid thought patterns actually trap people in the active throes of BPD until and unless they get professional help to begin to learn how to think beyond the constricted magical thinking of a primitive concept of cause and effect. Primitive concepts of cause and effect that along with rigid thought patterns are at the center of The Legacy of Abandonment in BPD A legacy of abandonment that is the central cause of Rage in BPD.
