Many disagree as to what an Empath is versus a Codependent. Many psychologists note that empaths have codependency and are codependents. Some will say empaths have codependent tendencies. This debate back and forth really misses the central point. That is,
Re-Frame Your Inner Critic Using The Art of Positive Self-Talk
Your self-talk reflects what you believe about yourself often from an internalized critical voice and narrative of a toxic emotional abuser. A narcissist, borderline or psychopathic parent and/or partner. Narcissistic abuse causes trauma, often resulting in Complex Post Traumatic Stress
Reclaiming Self – BPD, NPD, ASPD Abuse Recovery
This is the at the centre of most of the pain and trauma of Narcissistic Abuse for those who are/have been victims or are on the path to or are now survivors. What is this? The need to reclaim the
Narcissists Never Apologize – Don’t go down the rabbit hole
People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) never apologize. Why is that? How many times have you been down tumbling painfully down the rabbit hole of trying to be seen and heard when you have had your feelings hurt or your
Borderline Narcissist CoMorbid Parent(s) – Scapegoated Adult Child
I was the child of two co-morbid Borderline/Narcissists Parents with alcoholism mainly father and his side of family of origin and compulsive over-eating – father and his side of the family. I was the scapegoat child and the scapegoated adult-child.
This is Not The End Conversation on Borderline Personality Disorder
“This is Not the End – Conversations on Borderline Personality Disorder” is a new book out from Althea Press Edited by Tabetha Martin. It is compassionate book for those with BPD, Loved Ones, and Mental Health professionals. It includes insightful
How is a Narcissistic Family Identified – Application to Client Treatment
A Narcissistic Family is identified in a new way for Mental Health Professionals in a book written by Mental Health Professionals. This is so important because when in the trenches with clients with Narcissistic Personality Disorder or several NPD
Loved Ones of a Person with BPD Diagnosing Borderline is Not Often Helpful
The internet is a wonderful resource of information on a wide variety of topics as pertains to how people experience each other in family relationships, dating relationships, significant other relationships, friendships and so on. Just googling something, though it may
Are you A Victim With or Of Borderline Personality Narcissistic Personality and/or Codependence?
Are you a person with Borderline Personality Disorder, or Narcissistic Personality Disorder, or loved one of someone with BPD or NPD, a Codependent and you feel like a victim? Are you a victim? Feeling like a victim equals suffering.
When No Contact as an Adult-Child Is Necessary
Counsellor, Life Coach, and Mental Health Coach, A.J. Mahari, is an adult-child of a Borderline Personality Disordered Mother and (until the time of his passing in 1997) she was also the daughter of a father with Borderline Personality Disorder and
DBT Skills Can Help Anyone
Dialectical Behaviour Training, created by Dr. Marsha Linehan and originally for those with Borderline Personality has since been applied very successfully for to loved ones of those with BPD as well as those with NPD and their loved ones. DBT
People With Borderline Personality and Punishment
People with Borderline Personality often punish others. Firstly, it is important to note that they also punish themselves in the process. However, for those on the other side of someone with Borderline Personality, that’s little comfort, I know. This is
How To Know If You Have Borderline Personality (of if a loved one does)
Life Coach, BPD (and Loved Ones) Coach and Peer-Therapist, A.J. Mahari, talks about how you can answer the nagging questions about whether or not you or a loved one of yours may have Borderline Personality in this 66 minute audio.
Mahari talks about her own approach from her own expertise in understanding what Borderline Personality Disorder is often thought to be, how it is pathologized, how psychiatrists have check-lists that mean a lot of people with BPD (high-functioning people) aren’t getting the diagnosis they need to be able to understand what they need to learn more about and become more aware about so that they can heal.
BPD Loved Ones – and Compassion for those with Borderline Personality Disorder
Author, Life Coach, BPD/Mental Health Coach, A.J. Mahari, on video, on the subject of non borderlines, loved ones of those with BPD, partners, and family members having compassion for those who have Borderline Personality Disorder. Why is compassion for those with BPD important? What makes it challenging for those who are non borderline? Can compassion be confused with enabling and rescuing? Does compassion or lack thereof have anything to do with what you are experiencing from your borderline loved one? Can you or should you have compassion in the face of abuse, borderline rage, borderline splitting, on-again, off-again, cyclical and toxic relationships?
Can You Validate Your Borderline Loved One?
Many people who email A.J Mahari, and many of her Life Coaching clients who are loved ones, family members, partners or ex-partners or on-again, off-again partners of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder are asking her about validation. Does it help if you, as a loved one of someone with BPD, learn how to validate and support the person with BPD in your life in how they are feeling and what they are communicating?
Non Borderline Recovery – Life Coach A.J. Mahari
Non Borderlines, Loved ones of those with Borderline Personality, need their own recovery. Author, Life Coach, BPD/Mental Health Coach and Self Improvement Coach, A.J. Mahari talks about this in her latest video about Borderline Personality Disorder for non borderlines. Most people think that it is just people with BPD that need recovery when the truth of the matter is that Borderline Personality Disorder, and the dynamics it manifests in all forms of relationships means that both those with BPD and those who know them are affected and often in negative, confusing, and painful ways.
Adult Child Recovery – BPD NPD Personality Disordered Parent(s)
Adultchildrecoveryaudio1 Author, Life Coach, BPD and Mental Health Coach, recovered borderline, and adult child of two parents with BPD (one parent with BPD/NPD), A.J. Mahari has a new audio to help you to start and/or continue your own recovery. Learn effective tools and skills and boundaries to take back your own life. Learn to eliminate toxic guilt and feeling obligated to a personality-disordered parent.
Adult Children of BPD Need Their Own Recovery
Speaking not only as a Life Coach, BPD, and mental Health Coach, A.J. Mahari emphasizes to you, if you are adult child of a parent with BPD, NPD, or any personality disorder (or combination of said) that you need your own recovery. Children do learn what they live. A great deal of the inter-generational suffering of those who were the children of a personality disordered parent or parents has to do with the toxic legacy of not resolving issues such as codependence, enmeshment, toxic relating, chaotic and unhealthy relationships with one’s parent(s). There is a legacy to having been the child of a personality disordered parent or parents and A.J. Mahari knows this all-too-well in her own personal life as well having had a mother with BPD and a father with BPD/NPD. Personality Disordered parents are not emotionally available and children are negatively impacted as a result. Adult children of a personality disordered parent or parents need their own recovery.
BPD is not a Brain Disease and You Can Recover – BPD Memoir and Autobiography
I now have a new site where I will be sharing much more about recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. This site will include video, audio, blogs, and coming very soon – excerpts from my up-coming memoir about my recovery from
Coaching and Understanding to Help BPD Loved Ones (Non Borderlines) Cope with Someone With BPD in Your Life
Loved ones, family members, partners or ex-partners of those with Borderline Personality Disorder are often confused, in pain, and struggling to cope with a loved one with BPD. Life Coach, BPD and Mental Health Coach A.J. Mahari was interviewed on the healthyplace.com Mental Health TV Show on the subject of BPD Loved ones and Coping with someone in your life with BPD. This interview has been broken up into three parts to fit on youtube. You can watch the there excerpts of this interview below or by going to my YouTube Channel
